The Post That Doesn't Actually Say Anything...

I would say that I'm surprised that it has been more than a week since my last post, but if I really want to lay claim to total honesty here on this blog, I won't. I've just been so busy doing all the pertinent tasks required to be considered a productive father/son/man/friend/buddy/writer/gamer/geek/nei...oh fuck, you get the point. In other words, I've been busy. But, as I sit here at 12:30 on a Friday night (or Saturday morning, if you really want to get fucking technical), listening to the pitter-patter of nature's life blood as it hits the ground (that's just a fancy way of saying it's raining) in an otherwise completely silent house, the thought occurred to me that I should probably make words. And since I'm all alone (as I spend every Friday night; don't judge me), I figured those words should probably be of the written variety. I already know I'm half out of my mind on a regular basis anyway, so there's no need to further cement that image by talking out loud to myself. Although, Pea seems to do that a lot, so maybe there's some merit to it. Maybe she knows something I don't. 

Anyway, where the hell was I? Oh yeah, word making. Wait, written word making. Yeah, so here I am, late at night (yes, late. I'm old, so again, don't judge) with all the electronic gadgets and gizmos shut off (except my laptop of course), enjoying the silence. Just me and the raindrops. I figured I would bring the world up to speed in the happenings of all-things Ogre. Unfortunately, there's really not a lot to tell, which is terribly sad. In fact, I'm not sure which is more sad, the fact that there isn't much to tell or the fact that I'm actually admitting it. I'm still on the job hunt. The market is pure shit, plain and simple. Don't get me wrong, there's work out there. But there's also a fuck-ton of unemployed schmoes like myself, all vying for these jobs. And most of them don't roll as a single parent, as I do, so they have a little more flexibility in terms of their availability. Regardless, I'm still in search mode, dropping resumes and filling out applications daily.

Hmmm...the rain has stopped. Now it's almost too quiet. Maybe time for a quick song??

Ok, that's better...

Where was I? Oh yeah, my week. Anyway, my Mom came home for abit. For those unaware, she drives truck for a living, cross-country, all 48 states, so typically she's on the road for 8-12 weeks at a shot. Given how many creature comforts she has to forgo while she's out there, I turn the house over to her when she's home. So a lot of my "normal" activities are put on hiatus for the duration of her off time. It can be a bit of a pain, depending on what's on my plate, but she's been doing this for awhile, so I've become accustomed to the last minute juggling of plans.

Then Halloween arrived, which actually stretched out for us as my ex wanted to take Pea Trick-or-Treating on the day of, so Pea & I did our Halloween on the Saturday prior. We went to what was essentially a big field with a few vendors, a small haunted house, a decent sized kids zone with more bouncy houses than I have ever seen in a single place, and probably two dozen hot air balloons. Now, first, let me just say that bouncy houses are pure fucking evil and should never be allowed to exist. Or, at least until they make it standard that all of them must be able to accommodate Ogres and children. "We're sorry sir, but you are too big to go play and have fun." Fuck you. So we walked away (ok, so she walked, while I sulked) from the obviously prejudiced bouncy town and headed toward the haunted house. Keep in mind that it is still daylight at this point, and really, you don't go inside haunted houses during the day. That's a rule. I think it was on Moses tablets or something. Anyway, we bought our tickets and after about 10 minutes of cajoling (read: pulling the "I'm the Dad and I'm telling you how it is" card), I managed to convince Pea to pass on it until dark. To kill a little time, we watched the ballooners (Balloonees? Balloon operators? Guys who have mastered the art of hot air??) fill up the hot air balloons (which Pea got a kick out of. She had no idea how big they are) and then headed back to the haunted house. During this whole time, the haunted house was in full view, and some folks did go in, so she had the experience spoiled a little as the standard maniacal-chainsaw-guy-who-chases-you-out-at-the-end made his appearance many times. She said that she could tell it was all fake and that he wasn't scary. There's no way she would run from him like everyone else was. She will just walk away like normal. I believed her too, mostly because, as I said, she had been watching this for awhile before we went in. Then the sun decided it was time to make night-night, and we headed into the dark maze of fear (muahahahahaha!). Pea was great until about halfway through, when all of a sudden she grabbed my hand and squeezed until my fingernails popped off (ok, not really, but she did squeeze pretty hard). Then, as we neared the end, she asked me to go first (while still holding my hand, mind you). As we exited, chainsaw guy popped out and all of a sudden, Pea's hand was missing! No, he didn't cut it off. She just let go of me and did this magical transformation from an average 8 year old girl to a red blur streak. I looked in front of me and all I see is her hauling ass to get as far away from that guy as quickly as she could. Final analysis? The haunted house was a Grade A success! That and if there is any real danger near by, I'm on my own.

Short of all of that, my editing and review duties have been in overdrive. That's not unexpected though. The gaming industry still feels it's prudent to release about 10 games between January and September and roughly 3,485,978,602 games between October and December. It's the annual holiday push, so the reviewers are slammed. In my case, because I review and I edit every other review, I end up being a little busier than most. 

And that's about it. Sort of. I still have my daily Dad duties and all my other normal responsibilities. I just have had a little more on my plate than I normally do. Although, I do have a few topics lined up that I want to spew all over your monitors soon. I just haven't decided exactly when I plan to do it. Especially now as one of them was a topic of a podcast I guested on tonight. So it feels a little odd to tackle it here right after discussing it there. I'm thinking I may try and post that podcast here when it goes live, just so the few of you who do come here can check it out. We'll see. Plus, I could have totally gone all emo in this post. I've been stuck in this melancholy mood for the last week that I can't quite shake, no matter what I do. Podcasting, gaming, cooking, spending time with my mini-me, listening to music, watching TV, reading...yeah, not a fucking thing helps. Holiday blues? Loneliness? Sadness? Still grieving the loss of the love of my life? Who knows. I just hope it fades out soon cause to be honest, it's crimping my style. It's tiring putting on the happy face all the time when you aren't quite feeling it. I don't want to end this on a shitty note though, so I will wrap up this post with this:

It's Not As Easy As It Looks...

I never know what I'm going to write about on this blog. Where everywhere else I write is typically pre-planned, it is the complete opposite here. I never really do any research either, beyond a little fact checking every once in awhile when that tiny bit of doubt nags the back of my brain, like a game of Tug of War, yanking on my cerebral cortex. I just wait until inspiration slaps me upside my head and provides me with a topic to play with. Then I sit down and let my fingers do as they please, which, when you think about it, could be kind creepy, or erotic, depending on which ledge your mind sits on. Anyway, as I was on my way to pick up the Ogre Spawn (aka Pea, aka Elora, aka my daughter) from school, I got to thinking about her upbringing and what kind of an adult she may turn out to be.

Wait a minute, before I go any further, let me spill a few facts first. While I'm sure the ten of you who read this blog are already aware of all of this, there may still be one or two folks who pop in and don't know about the current state of Ogre Nation, Population: 2. I'm a 36 year old, single Dad of an 8 year old girl. I've been raising her full time - for the most part - for the last two years or so. My daughter (Pea, a nickname I've called her since birth) goes to see her mother on the weekends. I have a fabulous relationship with my ex and we confer about the pertinent things that parents need to...um...confer about. But I have Pea the majority of the time, so I impact a lot of the things that shape the little creature she is and the (hopefully) fabulous adult she'll blossom in to. This single responsibility is by far the most stressful and scary undertaking I have ever stepped in to.

As I was saying, I was on my way to pick her up from school when I started thinking about how being raised by a geeky single guy, who embraces randomness like the lips of a crackhead embraces a glass pipe, is affecting (or is it infecting?) her impressionable young mind. I'm not the stereotypical Dad. I prefer to keep things lighthearted and fun. If there isn't laughter or smiles, there's a problem. Our discussions always branch off into the odd or far-fetched, no matter how serious they are. The off-beat, the wacky, the nonsensical, the imaginative, those are all anchor points for me. (This has rubbed off on her at least a little bit. We are talking about a kid who recently managed to infuse my love of bacon with her Social Studies assignment, a Power Point presentation on the Statue of Liberty.) Video games, comic books, super heroes, Dungeons and Dragons, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Buffy, zombies, Sherlock Homes, Back to the Future, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, Lost Boys, The Crow, cartoons (Disney or otherwise), Pretty in Pink, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Bueller...basically anything science, horror, fantasy, or 80's related grabs my attention immediately. I'm a tech geek and I love it in all its forms, from computery goodies to entertainment devices to intelligent home appliances and more. I would rather shop at Fry's Electronics than Cabela's. Take me to a big box store like Walmart or Target and I gravitate toward the electronics or toy sections over home furnishings or clothing. I like to play with toys, color, finger paint, etc... Basically, I'm a big child. However, I'm not that one dimensional. As a fan of movies and music as a whole, I love a vast range of genres, spanning kid movies and chick flicks to heavy metal and country. I spent ten years in the construction industry and can handle a large majority of my home improvements. I can work on cars, although I prefer not to do more than the basics these days simply because newer cars are incredibly complex compared to the way they were when I was younger. The tool corral at Home Depot, Lowes and Sears is just as much of a toy store for me as Fry's Electronics is. Being raised by a single woman gave me a crash course in home economics for my formidable years, so I can clean house, do laundry, cook, so on and so forth.

But am I missing something? Is there a crucial component that I'm not teaching Pea? There are things that I just can't do. Trust me, I've tried. Painting fingernails, doing her hair, shopping for her clothes, and other typically female activities, I am terrible with. When I realized she was beginning to...how should I put this....journey into womanhood? Physically develop? Whatever, you get the point. Anyway, when I realized that and had to go get her first bras, I was dumbstruck. Anybody who was watching my Twitter feed that day saw my terror and feebleness oozing through the web like some sort of viscous blob. And then, I figured I had best have "the talk" with her. You know, explaining what to expect since she's heading down that path and could end up beginning her monthly cycle at any point. Thus, like a dutiful parent, I made the attempt at discussing it. I think I scarred her for life. Especially when she began asking questions that I had no fucking clue how to answer. Let me just say this now: I never felt more inept as a parent as I did that day.

How much of me is actually being absorbed by her? I'm a firm believer that we are, to a certain degree at least, a product of our environment. The people we surround ourselves with influence us, either directly or indirectly. At the same time, Pea seems to only pick up some of my traits. There's quite a few things that I like that she doesn't care for. She prefers pop music only (with a few exceptions). She likes video games, but only certain franchises/genres. The same can be said for her taste in movies. She has no desire to pick up a tool or do any handy work around the house, but she loves to cook with me. Even if you were to draw similarities between her and I, she is still very much her own person. Which makes it a delicate jaunt across a tightrope, as at the same time I want to nurture her individuality, I also want to broaden her mind. I want to teach her to appreciate many different tastes, genres, interests, and so on. Make her well rounded without sacrificing what makes her unique.

Again though, I'm always plagued with doubt. That ball of fiery concern that is constantly burning a hole in my psyche with the worry that I am failing her in some fashion or another. While it's all well and good that I can have fun with just about anything, and I can deal with a lot of stuff without morphing into Mr. Serious, but am I really setting the right examples? Is she learning the life skills she needs as she begins to look out at the world? There will come a point, probably sooner rather than later, where I won't be the center of her universe anymore. Am I prepping her properly for that? I have varied tastes, have been around the block many times, and have a vast skill set. But, I know there are lots of things that I'm clueless about. Are any of those things crucial to child rearing? Am I inadvertently handicapping her because of my ignorance? I've been told many times that I'm not the "typical" parent. While there is plenty of good to be gleaned from that, is it a detriment too? Are there key components that I'm missing because I don't always follow the traditional parenting methods? Also, as I said, she does see her Mom on the weekends, which is great, but does she need more than that in terms of a female role model or having that feminine touch in her life? If I find work that takes me out of state, Pea is coming with me, which will only make that aspect an even bigger challenge.

For all my worries though, I try not to dwell on it too much. I mean, it's natural, right? These miniature humanoids we create don't arrive with an instruction manual or a nifty PDF doc to guide us along the way. There's no reference guide and no support desk where some foreign fellow is sitting there, awaiting my call with his broken English and uber-thick accent. And we don't have that little 'Help' button we can click on either. Even though we take in as much advice as we can, when it comes down to it, we are winging it from beginning to end. There's several caveats that I adhere to and all I can do is hope that those core assets are enough. I let her learn via hands-on experience, and I let her fail, even when I know she will fail ahead of time. I try to let her forge her own definition of right and wrong, letting acceptance and respect for individuality provide the boundaries. Honesty, integrity, respect, responsibility, courage, humility, looking outside the box, multilateral thinking and the age-old "Golden Rule" are all paramount in my book, and I want her to value them as much as I do. If I can succeed in providing those basics as her foundation, then any house she builds as she ventures into adulthood will weather the test of time. And as a parent, I really can't ask for much more than that, can I?

Can You Smell What The Ogre Is Cookin'?

We all have a bit of ADHD to some degree or another. No, I don't mean that in the "bouncing off the walls" sort of way, but more like an inane ability to lose sight of what's important. To lose track of what counts. Life is a bitch and loves to bury us under a hailstorm of curveballs that beat and bruise us so badly, that it's completely understandable that we become distracted with our defenses and forget what it is we are defending in the first place.

I've been talking to several folks who have been going through a real rough time lately. I've been trying to help where I can, provide support and just be the ear that they need. The underlying theme I'm finding is that we are forgetting what matters. Employers, friends, lovers, broken dreams and unfulfilled desires, they all may be gone at any time. I say 'we' because I've lived this myself. As I've said in previous posts, I'm not going to detail everything. Some things just don't need to be shared. But I've had a fairly rough 6 months. I was away all summer. My personal life imploded. Twice. I'm unemployed. And I came very close to losing my life a few weeks ago. Needless to say, things haven't been all unicorns and rainbows in Casa de Ogre. A lot of the advice and support I've been giving have been done through gritted teeth as I was going through identical situations myself, although very few folks have known about it because, simply put, they don't need to. I don't need to burden anyone with my own hailstorm.

The point I'm trying to make is this: Life's complications? Fuck 'em. No, no, no, not in the derogatory sense. I just mean that there are tons of issues that creep up every day. Lady Life tosses speed bumps in front of us almost out of some sort of sadistic glee, just too see if we crack. And if we let it, we will. Some of these challenges are nothing. Maybe a little extra traffic in the afternoon or maybe some asshole was just rude and disrespectful to you. Some are a little more difficult to take on, such as an unforeseen expense at the wrong time or maybe you take ill. Others hit you a bit harder, like the loss of a job or your child has an accident or gets hurt. And yet others really lay the smackdown on you, such as the loss of a loved one, be it because they are no longer among us or they just decided they love another more than you. In any case, we will survive. It will hurt, I'm not saying it won't. However, the key is to wake up every morning and instead of seeing the dark, open your eyes to the light. We are surrounded by wonderful things, our family, our friends, our loved ones. Plus, believe it or not, it's the little things that will make or break you. When you are feeling the pain of loss, don't forget to appreciate what you take for granted. A sunny day. Flowers in bloom. A child's laughter. The smile that comes from a random good deed. Great conversations. A soft pillow. A beautiful song. I could go on and on, but I think you get the point. Once you put a little more into appreciating what specifically matters to you, you will find that the pain you felt throbs just a little less. The stress of needing to find that next job or getting past whatever difficulty that is plaguing you will all of a sudden seem a little less demanding. It won't fix anything for you. But it will make it a bit more bearable. Dwelling on what you can't control just enhances the bad, pushing the good further away. Do what you can, but don't forget that no matter what, it isn't the be-all/end-all of your world. Death is. As long as you still breathe, as long as blood still pumps in your veins, the game isn't over. 

We all forget these things. I'm disappointed at how much of it I myself had forgotten, and it took me toeing that line to remember. Don't ever forget what you take for granted, as they may not always be there. You may not always be there. So be sure to remind yourself every day that no matter how bad it feels, there's always a flip side. Take things one step at a time. Cut the negatives from your life, focus on what you have instead of what you don't, and give 110% to everything. The rest? Let the chips fall where they may. Because it isn't about that successful career path. And it isn't about how nice your car is. And love? It's a two way street and no matter how deep your feelings run, no matter how much passion you have and no matter how much you would be willing to endure for their happiness, you can't make the other person reciprocate. You just can't. So if they don't appreciate what you offer, let them go. They may be better off, or they may be more miserable. It doesn't matter as it's their choice. You will be better off. And one day, you will find someone who will appreciate all you have to give.

Harry Potter and the Ogre's Eye

Running through an entire film franchise, weekend marathon style, truly takes a certain measure of dedication. I'm not talking about your average trilogy, those are pretty easy. In fact, I just saw all three entries in the Back to the Future franchise last weekend, which is nothing when spread out across three days. No, what I'm talking about are the big'uns. You know, the uncut version of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, or the sextuple Star Wars set or even the redundant, yet massively sequel-heavy treatments that the horror genre has seen with the likes of A Nightmare on Elm St, Friday the 13th, Saw, and Final Destination. Anyone who chooses to re-watch any of these back-to-back has to be ready for a hefty time investment, on top of combating some level of boredom. Let's face it, if you are going to sit and watch an entire film series in a single showing, odds are, you are a big enough fan to have already seen each film at least once, and thereby already know how everything shakes out. That doesn't stop us though, now does it? True fans will always find something to get out of the experience, be it a greater appreciation for the work itself or to pick up on some of the more subtle nuances that one may have missed during initial or separate viewings.

Which leads me to the Harry Potter series. The final film, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt2, will be launching on Blu-Ray and DVD November 11th, 2011. I missed out of the theatrical release this past summer, so, as a huge fan of the HP universe, I've been hotly anticipating seeing how everything wraps up on-screen. Yes, I already know how it ends, I've read the books a few times and getting ready to start them again once I complete the Game of Thrones series. But I've approached the film franchise as a separate entity from the books, so my anticipation of the final film is just as strong as now as it was on July 21st, 2007 (the day the final book hit my hot little hands).

In preparation for this, I decided to make the run. You know, sit through all currently-available films across a single weekend. Daunting? Yes. But exciting as well since I haven't seen some of these in several years. And watching them all sequentially like this allowed me to do exactly as I noted above: Appreciate the subtleties. Most notable is just watching the stars grow up. The biggest jump in age was between the first two films, but that was because they hadn't set out on their accelerated filming schedule by that point. They had to be sure the first film would be received well and warrant the significant time and resource investment. Films based on other media properties can be a hit-or-miss venture. While Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter were smash successes, others didn't fare so well, such as Percy Jackson and, to a lesser extent, The Chronicles of Narnia. Needless to say, it was almost shocking to go back to the first film and see how tiny Radcliffe, Grint and Watson (Harry, Ron and Hermione, respectively) were back then. It's been 10 years since the first film hit theaters. These kids have literally grown up before our eyes, and that point is driven home all the more when viewing all the films like this.

I've always been a bit of a purist when it comes to transitioning properties from one media to another. I understand why changes have to be made, but I still don't like them. You can thank Rob Reiner and William Goldman for that. They ruined me at a young age. As the 1980's came to a close, I was a budding Stephen King fan. I adored books like It, Cujo, and The Stand. Thus, as the film adaption for Misery was being put together, I read the book first, so I would be ready for it. Big mistake. The changes they made for the big screen pissed my 15 year old self off so much that I immediately panned all book adaptions on principle alone. It wasn't until I gained a few years and began to understand why such changes are made before I began to accept Hollywood's attempt at literary adaptions. Now, I expect it. I focus more on crediting Hollywood for what they manage to keep instead of coming down on them for what they omit. In most cases, I approach them (the films) as a completely separate entity from the work they are based on, more of complementary material rather than a visual adaption. Really, it's the only way to not walk away from the theater completely pissed off. Just look at Will Smith's I Am Legend. Anyone who has read the Richard Matheson original won't even acknowledge the film as a related work.

The Harry Potter series is no different. Given the fact that the now eight movies have had four different directors, along with the sheer size of the source material, it is understandable that some things didn't make the cut. The final four books were huge, with Order of the Phoenix clocking in the biggest at a whopping 870 pages (and, oddly enough, was the shortest of the films). Getting all of that faithfully on screen would put the expense well out of normal range, on top of making the film much too long for the average film goer to handle in a single sitting. Fortunately, the adjustments made for the films didn't bother me too much. Probably the worst of them all was the Harry/Cho relationship, which played a much more prominent role in the books. Regardless, I'm good with what they have on film. I already know and accept that if I want a more fleshed out experience, I'll read and let my mind create the pictures for me.

As I said though, watching these again have allowed me to appreciate the little things a bit more. Snape's dialog was always the best of any character in the entire series, and arguably one of the best characters as a whole, but Alan Rickman's performance is nothing short of phenomenal. One may not see it as award winning, but the life he breathes into the character enhances it in every conceivable way. And yes, I did say Snape is potentially the best character in the series. He might seem to be a bad guy, but he isn't without his reasons. And the journey JK Rowling took us on, making us despise him, then almost like him (with a measure of distrust always lurking behind the scenes), then feel sorry for him, then hate him all the more by the time the final book unfolds, is simply wonderful. By the time it is all said and done, Snape steps out from behind the curtain and becomes the core of the entire tale, something that I, for one, never saw coming. And it made me appreciate the character even more. Alan Rickman embodies that from beginning to end.

While Snape may be one of the best, if not the best overall, there are others that have my heart as well. Oddly enough, my favorites are all apart of the supporting cast. I would have loved for people like Lupin, Tonks, Sirius, and Bellatrix to have bigger roles. Lupin and Tonks sit right next to Snape as my favorites of the entire series, and Sirius was probably the least utilized, but had the most potential. Oh, and Bellatrix? She's just fucking batshit, and I loved that about her. I loved it in the books and I loved it even more so in the films with Helena Bonham Carter's portrayal. I can't forget Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody either. He was one of the most gruff, yet entertaining parts of the HP equation and I would love to see him spun off into his own series, maybe covering his time as an Auror. 

It isn't all about what I loved though. Watching these movies again reminded me of what I didn't like as well. I don't care for Malfoy in any way. Set to be Harry's rival, he lost his purpose after the second chapter and never quite got his mojo back. It was hard to take him as a serious antagonist. Even later on when he picked up a bigger role in the The Half Blood Prince. It almost felt like Rowling knew he sucked, so she was trying to inject a little more into him, unsuccessfully so. However, the award for worst character still sits on Dolores Umbridge's mantel. In the books and on film, she is the most vile character of all. I don't hate her for any reason beyond the fact that she is simply a straight up bitch. At least with Snape, and even Voldemort, I understand their motivations. But her? She really doesn't have any. I detest her on every level and she isn't an enjoyable character to experience. I didn't like reading her and I don't like seeing her on screen.

One of the positives about seeing these films again is the fact that I know how it all comes out. Watching the relationship between Ron and Hermione slowly develop was great, especially given how well the film makers danced around it. It was flirted and teased forever and the payoff was well worth it. Having that big goofy grin hit my face as Harry and Cho kiss for the first time, just to feel it slowly fade away with the knowledge that it just isn't to be, sucked. Although, it could have been worse. This aspect was always a secondary priority for the films. The romantic relationships, be it Ron's, Hermione's, or either of Harry's, are much more developed and impactful in the books. So if you are looking to see that in a better light, go hit the library and check them out. Especially Harry and Cho. The films really fucked that one up. 

And finally, I appreciated the performances and casting on the whole a lot more this time around. Beyond what I have already covered with Helena Bonham Carter and Alan Rickman, Evanna Lynch was perfect for Luna Lovegood. Just the dreamy eyed look she always has on her face was enough to bring the character to life for me. And I don't know if I can read any scene with Hagrid in it without picturing Robbie Coletrane. Also, little did we know when we first saw them that Fiona Shaw and Robert Pattinson would catch our attention later on in True Blood and Twilight (respectively). Lastly, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Richard Harris. To me, even though we didn't have him for very long, he was always the better Dumbledore. No offense to Michael Gambon, I just thought that Harris embodied the character better.

Now that I'm done, was it worth the time investment? Most certainly. Even with the things that were cut, and the things that just never make it on screen in any adaption, I still love this franchise. Both the films and the books. While the novels will always be far superior to the movies, Hollywood did a decent job of putting the adventure of Harry and his gang, along with the ins and outs of Snape, to the big screen. Goblet of Fire is still my favorite, with Order of the Phoenix not far behind, but all the films are still enjoyable to watch, no matter how many times I have seen them. Not only am I now set for November 11th, but my desire to re-read through the books just jumped ten fold. 

Just Stop...

So, this comes up every now and then and today happens to fall into the "now" category, so I figured I would stop and jot a few thoughts down. You see, the Internet is a vast and wondrous land chock full of more information than an army of sentient sponges could absorb...

*sings* Who lives in a pineapple under the sea...?

Sorry, got a little distracted by the word sponge (OH SHINY!!). Anyway, there are two halves to this net-enabled whole: Those who provide the information and those who just suck it all in. Now, we are, by nature, a viral species when it comes to information. We like to give it just as much as we like to get it (actually, the same could be said for other things, but I'll leave that alone for now). With that said, no one really falls solely under either header. We all seek information and we all end up sharing our findings in some form or another. So what I'm about to say applies to everyone. Get your shit straight. Simple enough, right? Let me define it in the context of this post though. Before putting something on the web, be sure it is, to the best of your knowledge, accurate. I know, I know, that can be difficult sometimes, but it is easy to see when someone didn't at least make a reasonable effort to get their facts straight. There is no requisite exam to receive Internet privileged. So anyone could be reading what you put out there, including that massive section of the populace who don't know enough to even tie their own shoes and will actually take what you say at face value. What's worse is I'm only referring to those who honestly were just too lazy to fact check their work. I'm not even looking at those who purposely go out of their way to spread false information. That's a whole other post that, if I was to actually write it, would probably read something like "something something something TROLL something something something motherfucking idiot something something something get off the net". But I digress...

Some of you may ask where this is coming from. Essentially, it's a situation where someone writes a news article that is so chock full of bad information that there really is no reason for it to have ever been posted. And the sad part is that it's passed off as a factual news piece, where the unsuspecting reader will find it, read it over, and walk away knowing less than they did when they started. It's a terrible practice that is all-to-common these days where millions of sites are interested more in their hit count and ad revenue than their own integrity.

So please, if this applies to you, just stop. Really...just stop...

Brrraaaiiinnnzzz!

It is a little known fact that I love zombies. I know, I know, the whole craze has worn thin for most of you. Don't get me wrong, I totally understand that and am actually waiting for my enjoyment of it to diminish. As of right now, it hasn't. Not one, single bit. I just made that realization once again with the first episode of AMC's The Walking Dead, Season 2. The survivors have moved on, beginning their 125 mile trek to Fort Benning. As they stop to repair their RV, things go south when a herd of the animated meatbags pass through. Don't fret, I'm not going to carry the story any further, just in case you haven't seen it yet. The point is that this episode relied on just one thing: Tension. I don't care how many zombies we experience across any of the various types of media, be it on film, in video game form, or on paper with our graphic novels and books, these shuffling brainless creatures never cease to bring the scares to me. I don't know if it's their singular desire for consumption of human flesh, hearkening to our more primal nature, or if it's the fact that there is no means of controlling them. Whatever it is, I still enjoy having them as the primary antagonist. And since I'm here, AMC gets a big high five. I adored the comics, and I'm loving this just as much. In fact, they have done this so well that I've already begun to consider what else we could see make the transition over to the cable networks. Could The Sandman or Fables make the jump? Is it possible to get an expanded mini-series out of what is arguably Neil Gaiman's best work? Could AMC nab the television options for Fables from ABC (I think they still have it, if I remember right) and give us a proper anthology series? Once can only hope...

Principals Of What?

Ok, now I rarely go into politics on the social media forums beyond some isolated Tweets and re-Tweets. Not necessarily because of how much of a hot-button topic it can be, but more because the platforms themselves aren't terribly discussion-friendly. But here, I can roll it all out with no limitations. 

Anyway, the reason I chose now to post something is more of a boiling point thing. With all the protests, economic woes, and laughable candidates hitting the airwaves, there's something I think people need to be reminded of. There's a lot of misguided perceptions out there that is beginning to really bother me.

My high school government class was called Principles of Democracy. It was a required class for me to close that chapter of my life with a diploma in my hand. This is the same for most Americans, and subsequently, most people should have a working knowledge of how the process works. Everyone should understand the three branches that make up our system of government. Unfortunately, I am beginning to have my doubts...

First, anyone who thinks the President will "fix things" is an idiot. I don't care how many promises of "change" and "hope" or any other happy-go-lucky rhetoric are made on the election circuit, a single person in the Oval Office can barely fix their own child's toy, and absolutely cannot fix the country. Sure, it's possible......in a Monarchy. But we live in a Democracy, and simply put, one person does not wield that type of power. So stop buying into the hype as a singular means of resolving all our woes. Now, I'm generalizing here, as the actual number varies based upon a lot of different factors, but if you want change, you need to have roughly 358 people, carrying the same vision, without being influenced by the three B's (Bribery, Blackmail, and Bullying) that rules Capital Hill with an iron fist. Once you have that, then you'll be able to see things get done. Then you don't have to worry about Congress or the President getting cock-blocked at every turn. The thing is, getting that is virtually impossible in this day and age. It is hard enough to find one politician on the up and up, let alone 350 of them. Theoretically Democracy works on paper. Then again, so does Marxism. Unfortunately, human nature steps in and fucks it all up. No matter what you choose, greed prevails. That's why the Soviets fell from grace and that's why we are in the same free-fall right now.

It sounds fairly hopeless, right? And you are right, to an extent. It isn't totally hopeless, but it will be a long and arduous fight to get things back on track. And it all starts with you, my fellow Americans (Hehehe...I've always wanted to say that). This is really our own fault. We, as a collective, have become attuned to simply not giving a fuck. Sure, we whoop and holler whenever something bad happens overseas, but we turn a blind eye to what happens here at home. The average American gets up, goes to work, comes home and shuts their door on the world, instead opting to satiate their voyeuristic needs with picking the next American Idol and seeing what's happening at the Jersey Shore. Most of us don't know our neighbors, nor go out of our way to help anyone other than ourselves. And this isn't new. We've been drifting in this direction since the 80's, back when material excess was paramount and the dual-income family became mandatory. We have trained ourselves by sheer gluttony to only give a shit if we can point fingers at someone else. The whole "it's not my problem, so I'm not going to do anything about it" mentality has been in growing at an exponential rate. Now days, we don't want to take responsibility for anything. What? My kid just went to school and killed 40 people? Oh, it's the media's fault. It's the video games. It's the movies. It's the books. IT'S NOT MY FAULT. What? The country is crashing and burning? It's the politicians fault. It's big business' fault. IT'S NOT MY FAULT. You couldn't be more wrong...

Now, keep in mind, the blame for the issues we face domestically are indeed the fault of both business and politicians. But wait, didn't I just say it wasn't their fault? I did. And the reason why is because we empowered them. Those Congressmen you are pissed off at for not making adequate health care reforms or proper adjustments to our fundamentally broken immigration system? Yeah, we elected them. And we continue to do so. We want change? That's where it starts. Not with the lofty promises of one seeking your vote, but with your own effort and intelligence. Before you Occupy Wall Street, Occupy Main Street, or Occupy The Polls, you need to go to school...

I've been saying the same thing with just about every hot button topic and the same applies here. Educate yourself. Put int he work and learn about the process, the parties, and the candidates. I don't give a flying fuck who you want to vote for or what party you support. That's your own beliefs and you are fully entitled to it. But do your fucking homework. Learn about the candidates. Pay attention not just what they say, but they do. What they have done in the past. This applies to anyone running for office, regardless if it's for the local school district board or the President him (or her) self. Hell many, many folks don't vote at all. And a good chunk of those who do only vote in the Presidential elections. Again, the President can't fix everything alone. So you must vote in the Congressional elections as well. And you must do your due diligence for that too. The same can be said for the parties you support. We don't have to be a two-party system. The Republicans and Democrats may have the most popularity, and the most sway, but they aren't the only players on the roster. One of the biggest mistakes we make is voting for an individual out of party or name loyalty. I'm sorry to break it to you, but those two parties have evolved since your parents and your grand parents were young. Philosophies have changed, and so has their principles. So make certain that anything or anyone you support actually represents what you believe, and not just because that's how your family has always voted. I know a lot of folks who voted for a certain Congressman because that's the name they see the most on street corner signs and on TV, not because they actually know what the person stands for. And I know others who will vote Republican or Democrat, regardless of who the candidate is. This is why nothing is changing.

A couple of other caveats. First, don't rely on mainstream media to properly inform you of anything or adequately cover what needs to be covered. Regardless of what they present to you, every one of them is partisan in some form or another. Remember, a news outlet is a business just like any other. And they are swayed by that. But we have an advantage that our parents didn't have: the Internet. You will learn so much more there than you will on CNN or Fox News. Oh, and let me remind you that when I say "educate yourself", that means looking at both sides, not just one. See all the perspectives before making your decision. You'll be amazed at what you will learn.

Second, the electoral college needs to go. It's an antiquated system that was designed for a time when our primary means of communication was via the Pony Express. We've grown well beyond that and no longer need delegates to vote for us. It provides way too many holes that can be (and has been) exploited. It needs to be disbanded. Period.

I'm not tossing this out there to begin any flame wars. Nor am I putting this publicly as a means to sway your political affiliation. This is intended to provide a little clarity. I'm sick of seeing people roll out haphazard options and lay blame with a dirty finger. Our government is corrupt. Has been for a long time now. Most people just chose not to see it. Just look at the last 40 years. Out of the last eight Presidents, only two have held a measure of public respect: Clinton and Reagan. Everyone else - Nixon, Ford, Carter, the Bush boys and even Obama - all have dismal approval rating. That tells you right there, the issues are party agnostic. Both Republicans and Democrats have failed. Of course, it's a lot harder to hide things these days in this Internet Age, so more people are aware of what's going on. The passing of free information has opened the eyes of many, and it's time to pull our heads out of the sand and make the change happen. Not make someone else make the change, we need to make it.

One Of THOSE Nights...

I've ran through about a dozen different topics to write about tonight. Yet each time I sat down to actually do it, the words seemed to get stuck just short of my fingertips. I guess you can say I'm blocked, even though I don't really need to be putting anything to paper this evening. I have a review that still needs to be written, but I know better than to even attempt it on nights like this as frustration will certainly ensue. 

So here I sit, some random show on TV (I'm not even paying attention to it). Feet freezing for some reason, so I have my slippers on. Pea is in bed while I sit and stare at my laptop, trying to figure out if I even have anything that I really want to put on the Internet. I'm thinking not. Today ran a gauntlet of events, ranging from the ecstatic to the heart-wrenching, and everything in between. It's taken a ton of effort just to keep to everything balanced and not let the stress go to far or the blood pressure go to high (by order of the doc). I wonder if that's why I don't feel like I really have anything to say about any of it. Just sit here and let it all run its course. There's very little in this world that we can actually control and it would do everyone a load of good if they kept that in mind. Enjoy each minute you have, as you never know when it will come to an end, and roll with the rest. 

I will say that today remained busy throughout. I submitted another truckload of resumes (one of them has to hit, right?). Went to Pea's Parent/Teacher conference, which was made tremendously easier by the fact that her teacher & I are on the same page as to how to further her education. Played some Dark Souls, and yes, the complaints are true, progress in that game doesn't happen without many meetings with Lady Death (not the comic book character :P ). Batman: Arkham City is en route and another mystery package is coming as well. Well, it isn't a huge mystery as I do have an idea of what its contents may be. And when I'm done here, I plan to go spend some more quality time with with the Seven Kingdoms (Game of Thrones to those of you who have been under a geek-proof shelter over the last year or two). Speaking of, I think I'm going to kill this here. Winter is coming...

Let's See If I Can Fini...zzzzzz

So. Fucking. Tired. I would say I slept terribly last night, but "slept" in any context would be inaccurate. And given that I can't have energy drinks anymore, I think I became the poster child for dragging ass. Oddly enough though, I did manage to accomplish a few things. Knocked out a couple of reviews, submitted several more resumes, put a few more issues of GamerDad into motion and even got some presents in the mail (a copy of Dark Souls for review and a Subway giftcard). How I remained productive, considering my brain gears have been rusted solid all day, I couldn't tell you. In retrospect, I'm not really glad I opted out of the podcast tonight.

Speaking of the podcast, I really need to get with Bill and find a better way of doing it. I can't help but feel like we keep retreading the same ground. There are plenty of things to discuss, yet we keep returning to things like beta tests and piss poor marketing programs. The next topic we will cover will be a bit different, but I want to make sure we keep it that way. Dead horses are exactly that: DEAD. If it wasn't for the fact that a lot of times I'm playing things that I can't discuss (due to embargos), I'd say we need to focus more on that. I'll have to sit and think about it for a bit. Probably not tonight thou...zzzzzzzzzz

Annnnndddd We're Off!

Alright, now that the obligatory "why the hell am I here" explanation is out of the way, I can start using this the way I intended to, as a forum for me to talk about...stuff. I have no idea how often I'll be here. I do still have other obligations, beyond the demands of daily life. And while this is still uncensored, there will be some things that I won't go in to, as I still need to respect my various embargos. But I do plan to try to put something here as often as I can.

So here I sit, feet up, Back to the Future III on my TV (one of my favorite film franchises), Pea just ran off to bed while I sit here and try to find my muse. I have three reviews I need to write, one of which really should go up tomorrow morning as soon as the embargo lifts, but I just can't quite find that spark to get me going. Everything I write begins with that. A spark. A burst of inspiration that drives the entire piece. Without it, I'm left with a hodgepodge of incomplete thoughts, fragmented in so many ways that they will be meaningless if I choose to actually put them to paper. Given that it's now 8:55pm, I hope I find it soon. I actually intended to go to bed early tonight. Yeah, probably not.

I can't complain too much though. I did get a ton of much-needed rest this weekend. I'm still in recovery mode (no, I won't elaborate from what; let's just say that I've had some troubling health issues as of late), so this weekend has done me a load of good. I rested, slept (a lot), watched a few movies (the BttF Trilogy), played some games (Dungeon Defenders and NBA Jam: On Fire Edition), visited with family when they came over to check on me and....yeah, that was pretty much it. Now that the weekend is coming to a close, it suddenly dawns on me that October is halfway over already. How the hell did I lose 2 weeks? I would have sworn that the 1st was just a couple of days ago. I mean, sure, this has been an eventful month, but 2 weeks? Really? Next thing I know, Santa will be dropping through the chimney...

The King Has Returned...

You know, I still find it a bit odd that I write as much as I do. I mean, you are seeing the typed words of a guy who detested English in high school (I was always a big history buff and science guy). Anyway, as someone who avoided writing in any organized form for so many years, it's a bit odd to see myself now, at 36 years old, writing more than I ever have in my entire life. And not just that, but enjoying it the whole time. I write about the gaming industry (over at GameFocus). I am constantly on Twitter, Facebook, and Google +. I just started writing a bit about music over at Inside The Circle. I've been considering resurrecting Quagmire's Kingdom (my own gaming site that has been on hiatus for the last year and a half). And now I've brought the blog back. 

Social expression is the key. One look at just about any of my writing and you can see I'm much more of a conversational writer than anything else. I'll never be considered much of a story teller in novel-writer sense nor will anyone ever request me to put together a purely analytical piece. It just isn't my style.

Now, the bigger question is what could I possibly have to say here that I'm not already discussing elsewhere. And the answer? I have no clue. Essentially, I'm bringing the blog back as an amalgam forum. A place for me to put a voice to the happenings in my life. Something that allows me to collect my thoughts in a) more than 140 characters and b) something considerably more personal than anywhere else. Topics may range from my adventures as a single parent to my passions (gaming, music, movies, etc...) to, well, just about anything that strikes my fancy.

A little disclaimer though. I try to keep everything limited to PG-13 just about everywhere I am. Sure, I may drop an f-bomb every now and then on the social networks, but for the most part, my words tend to stay clean just out of respect to those who may be reading them. That will not be the case here. I'm not saying there will be loads of nude pics and a swear word planted in every sentence, but I will not censor myself in any way here. If you don't like to see things like "fuck you" or the occasional innuendo-laden image, this is not the blog for you. You have been warned.

And I know that everyone tends to make their inaugural post more of an "About Me" type of post, but honestly, if you are reading this, odds are you already know "about me"...